|
Composers Forum |
|
Question #14 - What emotions do you feel right before a world premiere of one of your compositions? MSB - M. Susan Brown; SH - Steve Hahn; TK - Tim Krueger; TS - Terry Schlenker |
| MSB - Anxiety, joy, curiosity, fear of not having done the right things for the performers, anticipation, and awe at having birthed something wonderful into the world. SH - Always nervous. It is definitely a moment in time, and it’s there and gone. To date, I’ve performed every world premiere of my own compositions, which only adds to the nervousness. Sometimes the response is very gratifying, though, which is part of why I keep doing what I do. TK - I feel both exultation and trepidation. I strongly desire approval and acclamation, and I believe there is the potential for that. Of course, I feel trepidation because there is also the potential for disapproval and criticism. TS - For many years, I lived with deep insecurities about my music. Therefore, I wrote for about twenty years without seeking performances. When I finally felt secure enough to put my music out there, I was still extremely nervous about how people might respond to it. Since writing music is such a deeply personal expression, people’s responses can feel like a commentary on who you are. The longer I do this, however, the more secure I feel. If I have a premiere with St. Martin’s, it is important for me not to be nervous, as I have a contribution to make as a singer. The older I get, the more I am able to internally talk myself out of the nerves. |